Sunday, November 4, 2012

洋鬼子 (Foreign Devil) and NEW YORK PRIDE, BITCHES!





































Just thought I'd show off the "costume" I actually wore on Halloween (which was a work day) - I'm a Foreign Devil!

Also, this is post #666. So that's appropriate.

By the way - this is how New Yorkers respond to a crisis.  Also, this. Yeah, I agree with the cutout of that fat guy. F*** you, Sandy! Also, as per the Post-It, I'm also happy George Bush isn't President anymore. For this and other reasons. If anyone was wondering - if anyone reading this beyond real life friends even knew that I was a native New Yorker (state, not city) - my friends and family are fine. Parents don't have power, but they're getting by, friends are generally doing OK although things are rough right now.

In related NEW YORK PRIDE! news -

Along the lines of this clip (at about 6:30m) not long ago I managed to shock my husband for the first time in years. It's not like he doesn't know I'm a New Yorker - the first time he visited New York City it was with me. I speak pretty standard American English, though, with traces of a New York accent coming through only in very select words, and only very lightly ("water" is one such word). Friends not from those parts have told me that my accent thickens when I am in the city/tri-state area.

I guess Brendan, with his complete lack of a Maine accent and inability to imitate one, just wasn't aware that while I don't have the New York/Long Island/New Jersey amalgamation of accent-tacular accentiness, I can imitate it.

And the other day, I did.

I said something along the lines of:


"Yo, come down to Luigi&Schlomo's Secondhand Mattress Discounter and Pawn Shop. We got the mattress for you. Exit 18 off San

dusky Parkway in Poohackus. / Barbara. BARBARA! I'm talkin' to you! Don't you see me talkin' to your face? Where is the KFC Barbara? You didn't get the KFC! What are the kids gonna eat for breakfast! Goddamnit Barbara! OK OK, I'll do your commercial. OK. Where's the microphone? Mikey, will you SHUTTUP? JESUS! OK. I need some water. Thanks. Here we go. 'Vote for Al or Paulie gets it. PAID FOR BY FRIENDS OF SENATOR AL D'AMATO.'How's that? OK. BARBARA!!"


Which, you know, totally rude and stereotypical, except I'm from there so I figure it's OK. Just like how I'm part Polish so I'm allowed to think "Polack Swamp" is a funny name, but you're not.


I pulled the accent together from radio and local TV commercials I heard growing up, including ones for Al D'Amato's re-election campaigns, Kyle's mom on South Park, a pinch of my Grandma (maternal, not paternal), and my friend's mother from Syosset. 


Brendan: O_O


"You sound like the people on TV. Only TV people have that accent!"


Oh no, sweetie.


Oh...no no no.


All that is to say, as one of you, I'm pullin' for ya, New York. In my own "yo, one twist of fate and I could've grown up talkin' like that" way. You too, Jersey, even though most New Yorkers don't even want to believe you're a real place. They think we upstaters are bumpkins, too, don't listen to them.


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1 comment:

myneonsignlullaby.com said...

I'm part Polish, as well. Despite of my last name, I look nothing like that part of my family. :)

I also have a part of my family in New York (not the city) and I do not have a Mainer accent. I'm actually quite okay with that. Everybody tends to think I am French-Canadian. Even Mainers....and French Canadians. =/

Nice horns. :D