The world is full of horrors beyond our comprehension, so let's talk about T-beauty

Look you guys, I just can't. Like...I can't. American voters actually voted for the guy who said "you won't have to vote again" if he wins. I bet if you asked, most of them would say they oppose fascism, but they sure didn't vote that way. 

And I just can't take that, because fascism -- and this may come as a surprise to many more than it should -- is bad. You don't even have to like socialism to believe that. If you think fascism is good, this is not the blog for you. If you think Trump is not one stripe of fascist, kindly never speak to me again. He bears all the hallmarks. 

It's already affecting Taiwan. TaiwanPlus reporter Louise Watt called Trump a "convicted felon", and her report was first removed, then altered. But that Trump is a convicted felon is a matter of fact, not opinion. She was not editorializing -- he is a convicted felon, by a court of law. Period. 

I get that Taiwan wants to be friendly to just about anyone in its quest to uphold its own sovereignty and TaiwanPlus is technically a government news outlet. However, if we can't even speak the truth here, if the news is too scared to state a fact, then what's even worth fighting for?  I don't just mean in Taiwan, I mean at all, for anything?

I can't take all this, I just can't. I have nothing in my heart for it. Only blackness remains. I'm willing to go scorched earth on this, but every cell that isn't numb and unforgiving is pained at taking such a hard stance. So before I completely lose it, let's talk about T-beauty. 

A lot of these types of articles recommend 5, maybe 10 products. They curate. But y'know what? Screw curation. I'm so utterly devastated by watching President Rapist actually win the election that I'm not gonna do that. I'm gonna go full-bore, window to the wall, the world can bite me on this. I'll probably never write about T-beauty again, either because I won't feel like it, or the resource wars will be upon us and we'll all be making soap from ashes and chemistry equipment scavenged from Tianshui Street. 

Phew. So.

T-beauty -- like K-beauty but with a T. Not Korea, but Taiwan. My interest in T-beauty arose from a desire to not rely on Western products unavailable in Taiwan; all that shipping and shoving things that leak and break in suitcases was simply not sustainable. Of course, many international beauty brands are available in Taiwan, but the cheap ones like Dove don't work that well for me, and I'm not a Duty Free bitch; I'm not gonna pay through the nose for something called "Face Caviar" (gross) from a brand called La Prairie, which is apparently Swiss. And as we all know, Switzerland is famed for its expanse of prairie.

High-quality products conceived and produced in Taiwan at reasonable prices, from the more artisanal brands found in places like Eslite and Hayashi to affordable options at drugstores, were a good alternative to explore. 

Besides, most (and possibly soon all) of the United States no longer thinks my body is my own, but I still do, and I would like to maintain good skincare whilst telling fascists to eat shit and possibly throwing Molotovs at them (we'll see how things evolve -- I am open to all anti-fascist possibilities). I realize I'm not exactly sticking it to the man -- after all, the incoming regime is fine with beauty care, when they're not shaming us for spending time and money on it. We're just ornamental to them. Trump certainly thinks of us as mobile sex ports unfortunately burdened with sentience, and so do many of his minions. I do enjoy it for myself, though.

There are a lot of great articles recommending different products, but they can't guarantee that those products will work on my fickle skin and hair. I haven't found a big difference in how products popular in Asia affect my skin, but my hair is notably different from the local norm. 

I do have my favorites, though, and I've divided these recommendations based on where they're used on the body, or at least where I use them.

From here -- finally, an achievable path to home ownership!

Hair

My hair is fine but very wavy; it will even curl in the right conditions. It's thinned out a lot since COVID, and while I don't heat-style it at all, I do color it. It's impossible to comb without conditioner. My face tends toward oily but my scalp dries out easily. I leave two full days between each hair wash, and try for three if I think I'll make it without an itchy scalp. Here's what works for me:

Shampoo

I like most of Cha Tzu Tang's shampoos, with the exception of the Incense Cedar Leaf Purifying Shampoo, which feels amazing on the first use, then dries out my scalp after every subsequent wash. My current favorite is the Mulberry Repairing Shampoo, but I've had good luck with their Mallow Volumizing Shampoo as well. 

Another long-time favorite is Yuan. While long-term use of their signature Alpinia Speciosa "Head Water" can sometimes lead to drying, it always results in lots of shine. 

For color-treated hair, there's really only one good option: Greenvines' Know More Color Vibrancy Shampoo. In general I find many of Greenvines' face products to be a bit too heavy for my oily skin, but their hair and body care is fantastic.

Conditioner

Good conditioner is especially hard to source, and it even took me awhile to find a salon that uses it without question or protest. Or worse, let their assistants who do all the work just neglect it without telling me, and then wonder why I'm crying as they rip out my already thin hair trying to comb it. Horrible memories.

Conditioner, then, was once a product that I exclusively brought over from the US. But I doubt I'll be visiting at all in the next four years, if not longer, because the latest wave of "your body my choice" nonsense on the back of President Rapist's victory has me genuinely worried about encounters with misogynists who don't understand consent and feel entitled to women's bodies. You know, like the president-elect does. 

As someone who has been sexually assaulted -- not raped, but it could have turned into that if things had gone differently -- this also raises my hackles in a PTSD sort of way. I cannot fathom spending even one minute in a country where most of my fellow voting citizens knew perfectly well that Donald Trump is a convicted rapist, but voted for him anyway. Which means on some level, they think it is okay to be a rapist. Which means they think rape is okay. Which means they think what almost happened to me was okay. It's okay that the President of the United States has, to all public knowledge, actually done worse, and to many women. More than twenty, at last count.

Or they think all those women are lying, which means they're misogynists who still don't respect women or their bodies. 

Anyway, I can't get over this. I cannot forgive and cannot speak to anyone who thinks rape is acceptable, so I guess I'm buying my conditioner in Taiwan.

Both Cha Tzu Tang's Marigold Hair Conditioner, which is a solid basic option, and Rosskastanie Revitalizing Conditioner work for me. Yuan has a few options, but their Hair Treatment -- the more expensive one in the white tube -- is amazing. Worth every penny. Ginger Acre (also called Ginger Ginger or 薑心比心) offers a lighter Orange & Ginger conditioner that I like when all the moisture I pour into my hair feels like too much, and it needs a rest while still being conditioned.

Of course, all of these brands offer other products -- Greenvines has a detangling conditioner I'm interested in testing, for example -- but I can only talk about what I've actually tried and liked.

Leave-in Treatments

There are a few Taiwanese options for products you leave in hair, but I've only really tried one: Yuan's Lemon Hair Cream. It doesn't really add moisture, which is good when I'm a day away from a wash. You'd think as a cream that it would be heavy, but it's not -- it creates texture in the hair and adds quite a lot of shine, without the weight. 

I have so many leave-in products to work through that it might be awhile before I get to these, but I'm curious about Greenvines' Recharging Leave-In Treatment, as well as their various scalp and hair oils. 

Another option that's worked for me is just basic drugstore pure aloe gel. Some of these are Korean, some are Taiwanese, so I can't recommend a specific brand. But any inexpensive aloe gel, rubbed into wet hair, will add an oil-free, grease-free moisture boost that my hair loves.

Otherwise, I have to admit I still use non-Taiwanese leave-in products -- mostly Parkjun Labs' Protein LPP Oil from Korea, and Lucido-L hair holding cream from Japan, which feels like Elmer's Glue but is water soluble and actually holds my waves in place. 

Face

Despite being in my forties (yeah, I know) I still have a very oily face. I'm not very wrinkly but I still get big, ugly zits. Taipei's humid, subtropical climate is said to keep people looking young -- I don't know if that's true, but I can say that my face never feels dry here. While most Taiwanese seem to be looking for moisture in their face care products, I look for clarity. 

You know where you won't find clarity? A country where the majority of voters chose a felon for president. A few think he was wrongly convicted or "they" are "out to get him". But this is real life, get your conspiracy theory asses back to Ancient Aliens and leave the adults alone. Many, however, are perfectly aware that he did in fact commit all of those crimes, and still voted for him.

We've had felons in the White House before -- Nixon famously, but probably others as well. Somehow this bothers me less than the rape. Of course it's bad, and of course I wouldn't vote for a felon, but a lot of Americans might be numb to this. I mean, considering how common these sorts of crimes are whether by the wealthy.

Ah, the wealthy, whom people admire for no good reason, it's not like they're particularly smart. Have you met rich people? I have. Jesus Donkeycuck Christ. Honestly though, if you want to find crime, you don't even have to look at the billionaires. Check out the American government abroad. 

I can't do anything to wash this stain away from the country of my birth, but I can wash my face. 

Face Wash

Yuan has many facial cleansing gels, but to be honest my favorite product for this purpose is actually their soap. While I find the mugwort soap a bit too drying -- it works beautifully for a day or two, then my face actually gets oilier -- their gromwell & roselle soap, mung bean & job's tears soap and yellow sage soap have all worked. I only use a cleanser in the morning along with one of those vibrating exfoliant machines that sounds like a sex toy; in the evenings I wash with just warm water, dried with a soft towel. 

I've heard people say that Yuan soaps are drying, and that can be true. But that's what my face needs -- I've tried to fight grease with moisture and it doesn't work. Your mileage may vary.

I don't vary my face washing much, so I don't have a wide range of products to recommend. It's taken me a long time to get my post-wash face care routine down though, so I have a lot more to say.


Morning Skincare

Most face lotions, including Taiwanese ones, are too heavy for me. If you have dry skin they may work for you, however. I've narrowed it down to one toner, and one serum -- although the serum is optional if I'm feeling especially greasy. 

Toners that have worked for me include 23.5N's Oriental Beauty Tea Balancing Toner and Naruko's Green Tea Shine Control Toner. Despite the Japanese name, Naruko is a Taiwanese drugstore brand. A student of mine once commented that it's popular with and targeted at Taiwanese female college students, both in terms of the focus on treating oily skin and the low price point. 23.5N's Bamboo Ultra Hydrating and Yuan's Wild Mugwort toners are also lovely, though I prefer the long-term results of the Oriental Beauty Tea product.

If I'm traveling in the US, I carry a travel bottle of Greenvines' Know More Awakening Toner. It's too thick for Taiwan's climate (yes, I know, I find even a toner too thick!) but perfect for, say, winter in New England.

Not that I'll be experiencing an American winter anytime soon. Unless of course we mean nuclear winter, because Trump's comfort with autocrats around the world -- especially Putin, but others too -- make me genuinely afraid that his idiocy and predilection for both chaos and control will lead to World War III. 

And people chose that. They chose it. How can I look my fellow citizens in the face again?

If I've got a zit, which I usually do, I dab on some Naruko Triple Effect Blemish Clear Serum. It really does reduce redness and inflammation in pimples, and I find they disappear more quickly. 

If I want to add a serum after that, there's really only one good option: 23.5N's Rice Soothing Active Essence. Anything heavier than this and I get real zitty, real fast. 

I do use an eye cream, because I'm old. Naruko's basic eye cream is great and available at Watson's. Honestly, the skin around the eyes needs a lot less special care than marketers have led us to believe. If I want to be ~*~fancy~*~, 23.5N's Red Pearl Barley Whitening Eye Gel is a good choice.

This is the only "whitening" product I'll use, because if you've met me, you know that not only do I not need to my skin to be any whiter (nobody does, honestly), but also I do not think it's possible. I could already get my makeup at the mortician's if I wore makeup. Which I don't, because if I have this strong a reaction to just toner, you can imagine how makeup makes my skin feel (like I've been hit by a clown wielding a well-frosted buttercream cake. And yes, I foiled your "cream pie" jokes. I win). 

In fact, the presence of whitening products in so much Taiwanese skincare, which are wholly unnecessary because skin of every color is beautiful, creates a challenge for the Westerner who just doesn't want it. I've inadvertently bought products that have bleached my colorful towels or caused my face to turn tingly, red and blotchy. 

Speaking of whitening, I'm terrified of Trump's rhetoric on immigrants. This is where I feel especially disheartened. Want to point out that immigrants are not only good for the economy but also commit fewer crimes than natural-born citizens? Get ready for a racist backlash based on lots of fear about a non-existent "migrant crisis" of criminals, fraudulent voters, job-stealers and dole-bludgers -- and zero evidence.

Trump is frighteningly non-specific about who will be targeted in these "mass deportations", so even though immigrant friends of mine are documented and legally in the country, I still fear for them. They might not get deported, but they will probably encounter quite a lot more racism than they already do, now that racism is officially condoned and part of presidential rhetoric.

Oh yeah, and as an Armenian-American, you can imagine how deeply the phrase "mass deportations" labeled as "necessary" for "national security" makes me feel that this world truly is full of horrors beyond our comprehension. Have we learned nothing from history?

Apparently not, and we're going to learn even less, because we're also about to start defunding education.

Evening Skincare

If I've made it to the evening without Xanax, which I usually don't these days, I might have the energy for some evening skincare. I usually use Naruko's Green Tea Shine Control Clear Night Jelly, but a fancier option with great results is 23.5N's Bamboo Ultra Hydrating or Oriental Beauty Tea Balancing gel masks, used in very small quantities. I imagine the Rice Soothing Active Gel Mask is fantastic as well, as I like that entire product line.

If I really need to calm down about the fact that more than one cabinet pick is bogged down by sexual misconduct allegations -- one famously being an accused pedophile -- I might do a mask. Yuan has great masks, with my preference being the Wild Mugwort Soothing Black Mask. You can never go wrong with 23.5N masks, with my favorite being the Rice Soothing Active Feather Masks. I also like MyBeautyDiary Witch Hazel Oil Control masks and both Naruko's Tea Tree, Narcissus Repairing and Magnolia Firming masks. Forest Beauty masks are affordable and smell amazing. I'm especially fond of their tea series, most notably the Alishan Green Tea firming mask.

I have less to say about evening skin care than morning, so I'll mention Yuan's Hinoki toothpaste here. I wouldn't have thought to try a fancy toothpaste with an unusual flavor and scent, but I was given a tube and liked it. Will I spend my own money on it? Perhaps! 

I can't say it helps me wash the taste of burgeoning worldwide fascism out of my mouth. Nothing can keep me from despairing that despite our efforts, the dictators and wannabe-dictators are winning. 

Body Care

It's unclear to what extent Trump will be influenced by mustelified man-child Elon Musk, who "thinks he understands China well" but clearly doesn't, as he believes "Taiwan is an integral part of China". It isn't and arguably never has been, not even under the Qing, which controlled only the western third of Taiwan for most of its reign, and treated it like a colony and 'defensive hedge', not an integral part of anything). But, it will certainly be to an extent. 

Perhaps his choice of Marco Rubio for secretary of state will counter that -- Rubio is famously pro-Taiwan, which raises questions of why all the worst people in American politics, except Trump, seem to support this country. I still haven't really come to terms with that, and never will. 

But Rubio is also a misogynist fuckpig who thinks women have no bodily autonomy, so even without delving into the other foreign-policy implications of this choice, as a woman he makes my entire body do the AOL "Goodbye" sound.

Regardless, if the Trump team signals to Russia that it can conquer Ukraine unopposed, and to Israel that it can "finish the job" of annexing chunks of Palestine and committing atrocity after atrocity against Palestinians, I don't know that Rubio alone will be enough to still China's hand. 

So, if we're going to be in the trenches lobbing Molotovs at the PLA as it marches on Taipei, we're going to want to be clean and well-moisturized.

Unfortunately, I am a boring person who doesn't have a particularly varied routine, but I'm a big fan of Cha Tzu Tang's Taiwan Incense Cedar Leaf Body Wash. The scent might be a bit strong for some, but I love it -- it's too bad the shampoo doesn't quite work for me. For something lighter, try Cha Tzu Tang's Lotus Leaf Moisturizing Body Wash. I find Yuan soap a little too drying for the rest of my skin, but their body washes are quite nice. I love citrus, so lemon is my preferred scent.

I don't really like keeping so many bottles around, though, so I often opt for bar soap. For non-drying options, I find Dachun Soap is easily the best. My favorites among their offerings are Classic Tea Soap and Taiwan Native Red Quinoa Soap.

When we're in bomb shelters sharing rations, we'll want to be moisturized. It's hard for me to recommend a specific body lotion as most T-beauty brands offer them, and they're about equally good in my estimation. My favorite scents are typically from Cha Tzu Tang and Ginger Acre. 

There's also Greenvines' Auscentic moisturizing body oil, which absorbs quickly -- no grease -- and smells amazing. I'm a fan of their Awakening Grace scent, but it's expensive, so I've only bought it once. Someday I may try the Auscentic body washes as well.

If I'm not wearing perfume, I like Naruko's Green Tea Body Spray. It's great for controlling the acne that I get in...places. Honestly, don't ask.

If I am wearing perfume, I generally don't prefer anything too sweet or feminine. Dachun's East Fame, Pseven's Aged Tea and Ruby, and Take a Snooze's #14 Earl are among my favorite Taiwanese scents. 23.5N has a range of aromatic oils, with Summer Solstice being my favorite. Yuan has a few as well, and they're all good. 

And if I'm taking a bath, I usually add salts. While I usually make my own blend of Epsom salts and essential oil or buy Japanese bath salts from Tokyu Hands, Yuan's Repose aromatic bath salts are also fantastic.

Hand and Foot Care

We're going to want to keep our hands clean during the resource wars, both metaphorically as our (elected!) leaders sell us out to the highest bidder, and also literally. How is the world going to look health-wise after RFK guts the FDA while demonizing vaccines? How many more epidemics will be unleashed? Who knows, but wash those hands. I keep Cha Tzu Tang handwash in my kitchen -- I can't find the lavender one I have now on their page, but they're all good -- and Yuan handwash in the bathroom. 

I did try bar soap for this purpose to cut down on bottle consumption, but I found it made me not want to wash my hands. That's no good, so I just got the bottles.

Because I'm white, I probably won't be marched to a death camp by either China (in Taiwan), Israel (in Palestine) or the US (on its own soil). But who knows, so it's good to stay moisturized. Also, dry hands and feet can lead to micro-cracks and cuts that can let bacteria in, and you won't want that in the coming years.

So, Cha Tzu Tang's Lotus Leaf moisturizer is perfect for hands. I find Yuan's lotions a bit heavy for hands, but their Rose Hand Cream is just right for suffering feet. 

But whatever. 

I want to believe that fascism can be fought and defeated, that this "enemy from within" stuff, calling centrist (dare I say mildly conservative) liberals 'radical socialists', was from history textbooks, not current speeches.

We kinda-sorta stopped it once, no? These days, though, it feels like kudzu. Fighting it seems to stimulate its growth; anyone who's battled hate against a particular group will be familiar with this dynamic. As a woman who cares about gender equality, it reminds me of young men turning misogynist in larger numbers in response to improvements in women's rights and status in society. 

Truly, I have no idea how we're going to stop Stupid Chaos Mussolini. Those who voted for him seem to want to 'unite' and be friendly again; I can't do that. I can't even offer forgiveness, let alone kindness or friendship. I suppose someone's got to talk to the people who aren't exactly fascists but still made excuses to vote for one -- who knowingly chose a rapist. 

I can't be that person, though. They're either going to have to fix their own shit, or we're going to have to fix this whole thing the same way we had to handle it about 85 years ago. Think it can't happen again? That's what they thought in the early 1930s, too.

Dancing the ol' Taiwanese Government Shuffle on dual nationality until we all die

 

I don't always use Wikimedia Commons for cover photos, but sometimes you just need an old lady dancing

It's no secret that once we decided Taiwan was our permanent home, we truly meant permanent. We intend to work, build lives, retire and die here just as millions of Taiwanese do, despite not being citizens. For people like us, dual nationality just makes sense. I've talked about this extensively before, and I'll summarize my case again below. 

But first, let's talk about the preliminary comments from Taiwan's Ministry of the Interior (MoI) on Crossroads Taiwan's petition to amend the nationality law and end the country's double standard on who can and cannot obtain a second nationality.

Those comments (translated by me) are a big fat pile o' nothing: 

 

Wu Hsin-te, Chief of the Nationality Administration Section of the Department of Household Affairs of the Ministry of Interior, said "Those with special distinctions and senior professionals can obtain dual nationality. This year's amendment allows senior professionals, who originally had to wait three years before they can apply for this period of residence, to do so in two years.”

Okay Mr. Wu, but that's not very helpful for those of us who are professionals and are skilled in our fields, but do not meet the frankly insane requirements in all but a few fields to be officially deemed "senior" or "special" professionals deserving of a path to dual nationality. 

In education, you have to be a professor. There is an exception for those who've published in "high impact journals" but this is a bit of a joke: who has the time or support to do that without the funding and access provided by universities? I have a Master's and I train Taiwanese teachers in exactly what they need to meet a specific government goal -- Bilingual by 2030 -- which happened to be the brainchild of President Lai Ching-te. I also help Taiwan's businesspeople better engage with international counterparts. I have been a teacher for two decades.

Yet I don't qualify. I'm not "special" or "senior" enough. 

I'd say that I "should" qualify (and I do feel that I do, without shame), but the entire notion of a class system of Deserving Foreigners vs. Garbage Foreigners is ridiculous. It should not exist at all. More on that below, too. 

 

The Ministry of the Interior emphasized that the country has a single nationality system...

 

This is false. Taiwanese can have more than one nationality, and so can the foreigners they deem to be not garbage. The MoI should not lie like this. 

...and the Nationality Law was just revised in May.

So? Revise it again. I don't care what you just did. Fix your problem, don't say it's half-fixed like that's sufficient.

Except for senior professionals such as senior engineers, or clergy and other distinguished persons who have contributed to Taiwan, they do not need to give up their citizenship, they can get ID cards.

Okay, so Taiwan doesn't have a "single nationality" policy. Why lie? 

What I want to know regarding this "single nationality policy" is why they think the double standard is acceptable. Most countries have the same law for everyone, naturalized or born. Either one can have multiple nationalities, or one can't. It's actually fairly rare to allow that privilege for born citizens, the descendants of ROC citizens abroad, and a very few Special Magic Foreigners but no one else. A few countries do this -- South Korea comes to mind -- but most don't. 

The US, for example, doesn't recognize other nationalities their citizens may have, but won't end their citizenship over it (most countries that allow multiple nationalities have such a policy). In fact, a few Americans who don't have ROC/Taiwanese heritage have obtained Taiwanese nationality without renouncing US citizenship.

Japan, on the other hand, has the same rule for everyone regardless of how you became Japanese: you can only be Japanese. If you're caught with another nationality, you either have to give it up or lose Japanese citizenship.

Besides, they think people like me and thousands of others who do work every day that do contribute to the economy, tax revenues and in other ways don't "contribute to Taiwan"?  My training Taiwanese teachers and helping Taiwanese business leaders do their jobs isn't "contributing to Taiwan"? 

Thanks. 

 

The revised law also solves the problem of the status of children born in illegal households. Stateless children can apply for naturalization with the assistance of social welfare agencies and guardians. 

 

That's great. Cool. But it doesn't really help the other mmigrants who have made their lives here but don't have the tools they need to retire in the country they call home. So it's a good start, but completely insufficient. 

Needless to say, it's disappointing. It's a nothingburger. 

And it underscores the completely bonkers caste system of Deserving vs. Garbage. I know there's an argument out there that Taiwan has the right to determine who gets access to dual nationality based on the talent it wants to attract. 

This is a stupid thing to think. 

First, the immigrants Taiwan needs the most are the blue-collar workers, mostly from Southeast Asia, who keep the factories and fishing boats running and take care of the grandparents. The Taiwanese government surely knows this, but doesn't tend to admit it. Without them, the economy would grind to a halt. 

Besides, having "the right" to do something (which Taiwan unarguably has) doesn't mean it's the right thing to do. 

I think what I do matters. I do believe I contribute in my way. However, if I left, Taiwan would survive. I'm white collar, but I am absolutely not as critical to Taiwan's core economic interests as the group who gets paid the least and treated the worst. The group that isn't even under discussion as having a path to dual nationality, even within Crossroads' campaign. 

Unfortunately, Crossroads' strategy is realistic: if the public can see that people like me deserve a path to dual nationality, it should be then a little easier to convince them that  similar path for blue-collar workers won't flood the country with job-takers, and most who come here to work eventually leave, anyway. Those of us who want to stay, including among blue-collar workers, are a smallish slice of the total foreign population.

With people who have ancestors who were ROC citizens having fairly easy access, despite the fact that their families may have no other connection to Taiwan, it's easy to see that Taiwan's preference is still based more on race and politics than actually "attracting the talent" Taiwan needs. The caste system is thus:

1.) People with Chinese (ROC) ancestry, under the assumption that this will make one "loyal" to Taiwan.

How? I cannot say. Loyalty isn't a genetic or race-based trait. I'm not against such people having that right, but can we just admit that it's also just an ethnic preference, like most jus sanguinis citizenship paths? 

2.) Relatively wealthy Westerners, most likely envisioned as "white people" in most Taiwanese government minds, even though not all Westerns are white, and Chinese spouses. 

In fact, Chinese spouses might be in the first group. It's debatable. 

3.) Regular Westerners (like me). White still probably preferred, because racism.

4.) Southeast Asian blue collar workers and most foreign spouses.


So please, please, do not tell me it's about "attracting talent". It's not. Taiwan needs the fourth group the most. But while I'm being hyperbolic when I say I'm considered garbage (I'm more like very nice recycling?), this crucial group is actually treated like garbage. It's not right.

It's all politics and discrimination. An absolute clownshow. Don't even pretend otherwise.

There is an optimistic reading of these comments, however. The Taiwanese government tends not to show its hand even if changes are being considered. It simply won't admit as much until the change is official. 

Take the economic subsidies. When Ma Ying-jeou's government handed out cash, permanent residents were excluded unless they had a local spouse. When we inquired, we were treated rather rudely. The subsidies were for "taxpayers". I am a taxpayer, but was told that being a taxpayer is not sufficient to get the benefits of...being a taxpayer. 

The government lackey who had the absolute stones to say that with a straight face has my eternal emnity. 

But then the COVID vouchers and NT$6,000 tax payback were rolled out under Tsai Ing-wen, and after a brief back-and-forth, permanent residents were included. This is certainly due in part to a different attitude toward foreign residents from different administrations -- Ma's people streamlined some processes for us, but at the end of the day, would never actually consider us part of the fabric of Taiwanese society. 

But it also means that a general attitude shift was afoot. We were rebuffed, but then the system changed.

It's an oft-made observation that the Taiwanese government does things in baby steps. Evolving nationality laws are part of that, and I have it on good authority that Tsai Ing-wen understood the need for them to change. Eventually, someday, Taiwan will probably relinquish the double standard, just as it's slowly fixing its mess in not making marriage equality truly equal. 

And I love Taiwan because here, things do tend to get better.

Here's the thing, though: it's too damn slow. Yes, I want this for Taiwan's own wellbeing -- immigrants are vital to its future. I want it for new generations of immigrants who move to Taiwan. 

But damn it, I also want it for me. And at the pace the government is moving, the change that will make it possible for me to truly call Taiwan home won't come until I'm too old to benefit, or long dead. 

What good is dual nationality, which would make it more possible for us to own a home where we can grow old in Taiwan, if we're 70 when it happens? Who buys their first home at 70? Who can? I'm not angry that it's a step-by-step process. I am very angry that it's going so slowly that I have less and less hope of seeing it in my lifetime. This doesn't just matter in general, it matters specifically to me. 

The only thing that does give me hope is that groups like Crossroads are making an effort. When civic groups get involved, it tends to speed up the pace of change. 

Why do I care so much? As a permanent resident, don't I have access to pension plans, labor insurance and health insurance? 

Yes, but it's not really sufficient. Leaving aside the more abstract desire to vote -- to have a civic voice and representation in the country I call home and would fight for  -- it matters for practical reasons as well. 

After building careers here and contributing to the country through our labor (we hope, anyway), access to the tools we'd need to retire here matter. Permanent residency is usually sufficient, but it does not give us access to everything we'd need to feasibly retire in Taiwan.

Home health aide and long-term care subsidies are out of reach. Although legally foreign residents can buy property in Taiwan, actually getting approved for a mortgage can be a challenge. If approved, we're likely to be asked for an infeasibly large deposit (I frequently hear 40%) and frankly insane interest rates. Programs to ease the burden for first-time homeowners? Once again out of reach. 

And yet, where are we supposed to live when we're old? Landlords don't like to rent to the elderly, but we don't have local family to take us in. 

Why don't we just renounce?

We have obligations in our country of birth that are not easily discharged, such as aging relatives. Post-renunciation resumption of citizenship is not a feasible option for Americans. As above, most other countries have the same rule for born and naturalized citizens, so we resent the double standard. 

More importantly, however, if we renounce, what are we supposed to do when our aging parents might need our care? We're not rich, we can't pay full-time health aides. We can't go back temporarily to be caretakers and not work as well. We just don't have that financial flexibility. 

I thought that Taiwan cared about family responsibility. Filial piety and all that. What is this if not the definition of filial piety, and yet Taiwan doesn't seem to value it at all when it comes from a foreigner. Does it only matter when the aging parents are Taiwanese?

Usually, we love that Taiwan is not like "most other countries". Life here is good. In this particular way, however, Taiwan diverges from the norm and for a country seeking to attract "foreign talent", it's a big fat problem.

If you like Pride, you'll love Trans Pride

Yes, of course, neither parade is 'for me', I'm the cishet lady who shows up to support the community but whose presence and opinion aren't really needed. But I'm gonna write this anyway because I just am.

Taipei Trans Pride has been held since 2019, and takes place the night before the main Pride event. Participants gather around 6:30pm -- at Red House Theater in the past, but at the amphitheater at 228 Park this year -- and set off about an hour later. I've heard differing accounts of why the start point changed, either that it can accommodate more people, or due to the significance of 228 Park in Taiwan's LGBTQIA+ history. It's probably a little of both. The route runs through Ximending, starting down Hengyang Road. 

Trans Pride doesn't get much publicity, and can be almost impossible to find information about in English -- it exists, but good luck. I knew in advance and should have written about it, but didn't, so I'm not immune to that criticism either. You'll have better luck searching for 台灣跨性別遊行 (Taiwan Trans Pride Parade), which will bring you to the Taiwan Tongzhi Hotline Association event page, among others. It amuses me somewhat that UDN wrote about it in advance, but seemed more concerned with traffic routes than equality. Maybe that's a good thing, though -- let's make trans, non-binary and gender non-conforming acceptance and celebration just that utterly commonplace.

                  

While not many sources write about the event in advance, plenty reported after the fact, including CNA, ICRT and UDN. Around 2,500 people attended -- that sounds about right, I would have guessed 3,000 -- and all performers were from the gender non-binary and diverse communities, according to Taiwan Tongzhi Hotline. These included stage hosts Shuhong and Orange and parade hosts Feifan and Viva. 

If you're thinking "Feifan? Isn't he that Sunflower Movement leader?" Different Feifan. Quick side story, I once met Feifan the performer, and they told me that during the Sunflower Movement he was doing his military service, and was deployed as a guard to a government building (they told me which one, but I've forgotten). Their peers, also doing mandatory service, kept joking that they could stop the movement at any time. I found it amusing, anyway. 

Some people held signs that blended international politics with trans rights, including "I don't want an independent transphobic Taiwan" (我不要恐跨的台獨, which I agree with and is also a pun on "I don't want transphobic attitudes").

Another sign said "Taiwan doesn't want Taiwan's radical advancement" -- a reference to the Taiwan Statebuilding Party (台灣基進黨), which was accused of transphobia not long ago. It's a long story and I probably don't understand enough of the details to write about it yet (if ever, but I'll try), but former party member Liu Pin-you (劉品佑) wrote a long, somewhat difficult to read post blasting Statebuilding for supporting the continued requirement of gender reassignment surgery to legally change one's gender in Taiwan.

Statebuilding's post doesn't exactly specify that they support a surgery requirement, but it's a bit weaselly -- they acknowledge the financial and health difficulties of such major surgeries, but go on to say that if the government doesn't explicitly define gender, that "women's spaces" should be determined by "sex representation", that is, one's genitalia. 

Which is, of course, just another way to say that sex can be reduced to genitalia, a position I -- as a woman and vagina-haver, so the sort of woman that transphobes think should be welcome in "women's spaces" to the exclusion of others -- do not agree with. I don't want to be in exclusionary spaces regardless. 

Statebuilding is getting lots of heat from the Taiwanese left on this. Good.

Anyway, I have no time for TERFs. I may have a vagina, but I don't want their "vaginas only" spaces, so let's not pretend that all cis women are in agreement on their agenda. We're not.

Back to Trans Pride.

The parade included many international participants, especially from other parts of Asia where acceptance may not be as high as Taiwan (which is hardly perfect, either). I saw Malaysian and Thai flags, and attendees came from the Philippines, Japan and elsewhere, as well. 

Taiwanese human rights, LGBTQIA+, corporate supporters and political groups also attended -- a full list can be found on the Taiwan Tongzhi Hotline website. We noticed flags for the Green Party and Taihu Brewing, but they were hardly the only ones.

Hua, the organizer of Thailand's Transgender Pride Parade, was quoted on Taiwan Tongzhi Hotline's page as saying that when "transgender people can develop freely, all genders in society can benefit." I couldn't agree more. I'm cis, but honestly, I wasn't always 100% sure of that. A long internal dialogue was necessary for me to come to that conclusion, and increasing dialogue about and acceptance of gender diversity gave me not just the lexical resource but the confidence to have that conversation with myself. In the end I realized I was the gender I was assigned at birth, but the process was deeply beneficial, helping me to better understand and be myself. 





Specifically, this personal experience has taught me that increasing acceptance of transgender people and open-minded discourse on these issues also increases acceptance of gender non-conforming preferences even among cisgender people like myself. Despite greater theoretical freedom to be oneself -- from laws that don't allow employers to discriminate based on gender to basic access to things like healthcare (still a battle) and bank accounts -- there are still a lot of bitter idiots who believe men should think, act and be one way, and women another. Hell, the Republican presidential nominee, who happens to be a rapist, and his weird minion who isn't a rapist as far as I know, but has some extremely scary views on women, seem to think as much.

As a woman with a loud mouth who prefers cats over children, I've come to realize that greater transgender acceptance and embracing the infinite diversity of people, personalities and preferences regardless of their genitalia fuel each other -- and yes, that does benefit all of us.

The fight is far from over, though. To legally change one's gender in Taiwan, one must undergo both psychiatric and gender reassignment surgery, which are massive barriers. As someone who doesn't think her vagina is what makes her a woman and has witnessed societal discrimination against not just cis women but gender non-conforming people as well, I just don't think surgery should be the bar. 

As a cis woman, I am not just happy but enthusiastic to welcome trans women, including those who haven't had surgery, into women's spaces. I don't think merely having a penis (or not having a vagina) makes a person unsafe in such a space.

In fact, I don't want to be in spaces that don't welcome them as well. 

This is improving in Taiwan, with court cases such as those of Xiao E and Nemo, ruling that they did not have to provide proof of surgery. Nemo in particular was unable to undergo this surgery, whereas in Xiao E's case, the court found that the Ministry of the Interior's requirement of reassignment surgery violated both an abstract legal principle (reservation of statutory power) and violated such persons' right to "health, personal traits, and human dignity."

Societal discrimination is still a problem, as is discrimination against transgender people within the greater alphabet community. At Pride, one may unfortunately still come across people who talk about LGBTQIA+ acceptance and, well, pride -- but leave out the "T" in that acronym. I'm not really qualified to talk more about this as I'm not really part of either community, but I know it exists. I've witnessed it personally, and it's disheartening.

To be honest, it was also a lot more fun to walk through Ximending at night rather than from City Hall down Ren'ai Road on a hot day, although I know it can be hard for people to make it to the Friday event after work. The numbers were more manageable as well. The main Pride event matters, of course, and I attended that too. But it's a hell of a lot easier to walk on a balmy evening with 2,500 people. Still, let's hope it's even more next year. 

All in all, I was happy for the chance to walk in solidarity at Trans Pride. I know I don't get to label myself an ally, but it's what I want and hope to be. An imperfect person who just wants to be herself, let others be who they are, erase whatever residual discriminatory tendencies or beliefs I might still have lurking in my subconscious, and be part of a more accepting world. 

The "contempt of the Legislature" battle wasn't a difference of opinion -- the KMT was just wrong

I know this painting at New York's Whitney Museum has a name, but I prefer to call it "Speaker Han" (the photo is mine). 

As an American, I see a lot of re-framing battles over basic rights re-framed as mere "differences of opinion" -- as though the rights and freedoms that are foundational to democracy are as subject to personal interpretation as, say, pizza toppings. I've seen blatant power grabs dismissed as as mundane, non-threatening policy platforms. 

I was similarly dismayed to watch the KMT, handed the eensiest bit of power after eight years lost in the woods, engage in a similar power grab with its attempt to expand legislative powers -- dismayed, but not surprised. This is how the KMT are. It's in their party's DNA to consider themselves the rightful leaders for whom democracy is an annoying inconvenience. 

If you're thinking this is also one of the hallmarks of fascist ideology, well, yes -- it is. 

And yet, as in the US, the KMT's actions garnered a fair amount of defense, as though the majority coalition has the right to a naked power grab simply because they form a majority, and anything they do is just a different policy position. I watched TV news and various commentators deride the DPP for not understanding that they no longer control the legislature, as though they had no reason or right to oppose expanded legislative powers.

As it turns out, the Constitutional Court disagrees: most of the legislature's expanded powers were deemed unconstitutional. 

Here's a quick summary of the ruling: 

The president can give a "State of the Union" address -- which was always a non-binding right the president has had, so no surprise there. It's not typically done, although I've started thinking of the Double Ten speeches as performing a similar function, but it was always a possibility.

However, the legislature can neither compel the president to do so, nor demand a a specific time or date for such an address. They cannot require the president to undergo an immediate question-and-answer session.

Also kept intact was the legislature's right to conduct investigations. However, that was never really in question: in 2004, constitutional interpretation #585 outlined the investigative powers of the Legislative Yuan very clearly -- they have them, when such investigations pertain directly to matters under their purview. 

If the legislature wants to investigate a matter already being investigated by the Control Yuan, they must "enter into negotiations" with the Control Yuan to do so, and cannot interfere with powers given to other branches of government. 

Also thrown out was the idea of "contempt of the Legislature", which would have allowed the legislature to take on judicial powers, punishing anyone it found to be in "contempt" with fines. "Contempt" was poorly-defined, but included refusing to appear, refusing to answer questions (whether or not sensitive information such as matters of national security would be protected was left unclear), providing false answers (with the legislature again taking judicial powers to determine what would constitute a falsehood) or "counter-questioning".

Just about anyone could be called in for questioning, from government officials to military leaders to individuals. In theory, this included everyone in Taiwan. Quite possibly, it gave the legislators the right to drag in anyone they wanted, from TSMC C.C. Wei to a journalist whose writing they don't like, ask a bunch of questions, determine that several answers they didn't like were actually "false" and punish them with massive fines for each individual "falsehood". 

Some might call this interpretation of the law 'fearmongering', but it really was that shoddily written, and the courts clearly agree.

That's all gone now, which means that investigations opened under these expanded powers, such as the egg import "scandal" (there is no scandal) and Mirror Media will likely have to be halted.

I feel kinda bad for people who defended these laws as something within the KMT and TPP's rights, simply because they'd done well in an election, or calling the DPP "authoritarian" for opposing it. You know, as though any law the government passes is ethics-neutral or is acceptable simply because it passed.

If the Constitutional Court says they never had the right to expand legislative powers, then they never had the right. Defending their power grab was foolish -- it amounted to defending unconstitutional actions. Bad look. Not demure, not mindful. 

So, to everyone who insisted the KMT was acting within bounds and not going against the ROC constitution that they claim to hold so dear, I hate to say I told y....oh wait, no I don't. I freakin' love it. I told you so!

The DPP was right to put up a spectacular fight against it. On this matter, they were always right. That they are a legislative minority is irrelevant.

This specific battle seems to have been won, but it's unlikely that the fight is over. Back in September, the KMT began taking aim at the judicial system, first criticizing Lai's judicial appointees. Maybe I'm reading too much into this, but calling judges "thugs" sounded a bit like, "nice branch of government you got there. It'd be a shame if, say, the legislature mucked that up." In other words, "you'd better not find our expanded powers unconstitutional or we'll make life hard for you."

Since July, they've been trying to push through reforms to the constitutional court. This is important because without an executive veto, the primary check on the legislature is that very court. (Meaning criticisms that the executive branch has too much power in Taiwan show a fundamental misunderstanding of how the balancing act works). 

These proposed changes would raise the number needed to reach a decision from half to two-thirds, based on the set number of 15 justices -- not the total number of incumbent justices (the actual number of sitting on the court may vary as judges step down or pass away). This would mean at least ten judges would need to be present to reach a decision, with seven in favor. 

However, seven justices are set to step down soon, and there is no mechanism for temporary appointees or term extensions. New judges are approved by the Legislative Yuan (a process few disagree with). If seven out of fifteen justices are stepping down, that leaves eight, not ten. The constitutional court would at that point be unable to function.

All the legislature has to do is refuse to confirm Lai's judicial nominees, and blammo! The constitutional court cannot issue rulings, and the legislature essentially has no check on its power.

The Judicial Reform Foundation has pointed out that proposing such reforms in the midst of a bruising battle over the legislature expanding its own powers is itself threatening behavior -- if you stop us, we'll bind and gag you. 

Like Americans who convince themselves that Trump's blatant fascism is just normal campaigning and Project 2025 wouldn't constitute a massive right-wing power grab, those who consider the Legislative Yuan's actions in Taiwan to be a part of normal democratic functioning are, well, deluded. And those who think the DPP are the power-grabbers are just full of themselves.

Symphony in White, or welcome to my midlife crisis

"Did you make it to the NGA?" one of my oldest friends asked as I slid into the car near her office in northern Virginia. I'd planned to have lunch with my dad in Maryland and then metro to the National Gallery of Art to stare at James Whistler's Symphony in White for an awkwardly long time, just like I used to do in college. I hadn't even planned on seeing other paintings. 

The timing hadn't worked out, though, and like so many missed connections, I lost my chance to see one of my favorite paintings for at least a year. 

I wasn't even sure why I'd forsaken a free crash pad in New York City for the trees, school buses and starter homes of northern Virginia, but something under my outer skin of dissatisfaction and inner baseline happiness said that this was where I should be for a few days. It was the site of my last depressive episode late in college, which I'd mistaken for senioritis at the time. I was staying with a friend from that time, and we had plans to Facetime with another. The fourth member of our little group made up my cohort of bridesmaids in 2010 but wasn't available. 

Four women who graduated together and remained friends for decades, who'd all taken different trajectories in life. One became a lawyer, married and bought the Falls Church starter home where I was staying. She'd quit her respectable job in an instant if she felt she could. Another became a stay-at-home mom in the Baltimore suburbs. The third got a Master's in early childhood education, married, had two kids, moved to the West Coast, and is now battling mental illness. 

And the fourth? She spent a some time in Asia and tried to build a life in DC, but ended up quitting her boring office job with the greige cubicles to move to Taiwan and explore a newfound passion for adult education. She wasn't very good at it at first, but got better over the years. She owns no home and has no children, but lives in a beautiful downtown apartment, speaks Mandarin and spends her double-income-no-kids cash on globetrotting.

Add to that a recent family reunion which involved spending a weekend with a group of people who are mostly related to me but have chosen myriad different life paths. Things I could have done but didn't: doctor, park ranger, entrepreneur, marketing specialist, architect, product director, data scientist, schoolteacher, housewife. 

My friends' stories are their own, but all of us seem to have been wondering recently if we'd make different choices if we could go back. Personally, I know I made the right decision to stay childfree, but wonder if all those years of insisting that I'd intentionally not boarded the bus to a better-respected and remunerated corporate job and single family home was a big fat lie: had I missed that bus, and was presenting it as a choice a mere salve for the ego? 

It's unclear, but I can say definitively that something is amiss. It's not that I'm unhappy, and certainly I don't want to blow up my life like so many people in their forties who know something is wrong. 

I spent these days listening to my college friends' victories and tribulations, wondering if I wasn't a bit jealous -- but of what? If my marriage remains happy and loving, I don't regret not having children, and I like where I live, what exactly is causing this melancholy?

Work is an easy but incomplete answer. I haven't felt long-term challenge or mental stimulation in my career for a few years. The golden period when I was mostly doing teacher training has passed, and with it a series of novel challenges that forced me to be creative and use all my fancy certifications and degrees. The improved pay is gone with it; I still do some, but most of my work now is back to the regular classroom, plus occasional teaching material design. 

Even though I find it a bit easy as I've done it for so long, that would be fine if I felt I was bringing in a satisfactory salary and professional recognition. As I watch others in my social circle get promotions and earn progressively more money, I'll admit I do feel a bit trapped. I guess I thought my work would evolve into something more, with more challenge and money attached. It never did, at least not enough.

This isn't something I could have imagined saying even two years ago, when I was mostly doing teacher training and would have said without hesitation that teaching was a passion. Someone I saw as a mentor at the time assured me that the job can evolve, and with that you'll have both fulfillment and more financial security. The fact that teaching simply doesn't pay all that well compared to most other white-collar (and quite a bit of blue-collar) work was fine when it was a calling, a passion, a fulfilling occupation that gave life meaning. 

But when it started to get a little stale, a little this again?, I started asking myself why I chased a poorly-paying passion over corporate whoredom. If sustained passion for work is a lie, and I'm not going to be wholly fulfilled or challenged by my job even if I reach for that unicorn, then why did I limit myself like this?

I could have been a musician. I was good once, or so I'm told. I studied International Affairs; I could have been an analyst. It's too bad I don't respect the bad ones, and most of them are bad. I could have done anything else, but I chose teaching. Now, I'm not sure why.

The truth is, while I once would have clung to teaching no matter what, right now I'd quit without hesitation if something more challenging with better pay popped up. I don't know if this is a fleeting thought or a more permanent disillusionment.

It does go a little deeper than mere work woes: I have ADHD  and anxiety -- now fully diagnosed but only somewhat successfully treated -- so just about everything rots on the vine for me eventually. I get distracted or bored, and struggle to engage fully. I could have worked my ass off in that greige office for a promotion, or rather, I couldn't because my staticky, undiagnosed brain refused to care despite consciously knowing that I should. Perhaps my falling out with teaching as a passion and career choice is just another in a string of dots I simply cannot connect.

I want more money and more challenge, but if you asked me what actual thing I want to do, well, I haven't got a goddamn clue. I'm not sure I ever will -- how does the old quote go? I have no dream job, I do not dream of labor.

Perhaps I would have made different choices if I'd gotten diagnosed earlier rather than flitting to the next dopamine hit, the next challenge, the next country, the next set of coursework, the next language. Hell, I can't even concentrate on Mandarin and have abandoned it for Taiwanese because it's more fun, more in line with my politics and a hell of a lot harder. 

This is complicated heavily by my choice of home. I don't want to leave Taiwan. My husband and this country are the two best things about my life. As someone who's always sought a meaningful vocation, this is hard to admit. So my marriage and my home now mean more to me than my career success? In 2002, Depressed Senioritis Jenna would have never guessed. 

But what else exactly can I do if I don't leave Taiwan? There are office jobs if you speak Mandarin (and often if you don't), but I don't specifically want one. In fact, The lack of reasonable time off alone sours that idea. I can't point to any specific perks such a job would offer beyond a more stable (but not necessarily high) salary, but there sure are a lot of drawbacks. 

Even if I do leave Taiwan, I'm not sure what I'd do exactly. I have certainly limited myself as a teacher; every time a friend or family member brings up what I might do if I returned to the West, they describe a life which is a marked step down. 

That's privilege, of course. Living in Taiwan provides the privilege of a good life as a slightly-bored freelancer, and that is in no small part due to whiteness, foreignness, or both. 

One of those friends called it privilege without compunction. She pointed out that all of us are struggling in some ways and killing it in others. Those who are grinding at work might have unhappy marriages. Happily married couples face different challenges as parents. I agreed about the privilege but pointed out that I'm doing okay, but not as well as I'd hoped. I've wanted to be a homeowner for some time, but am priced out of just about every market. We have retirement savings, but not enough. In fact, it will never be enough. That's not hyperbole; I've done the math. I'm on this wheel forever.

"You live downtown in that gorgeous space and travel the world. You're doing fine," she said. 

A cousin at the family reunion expressed her admiration for how "accomplished" I am. The compliment felt good in the way getting a tattoo feels good: an endorphin rush from a million tiny needle pricks. I couldn't figure out how exactly I was accomplished, at least compared to the impressive careers of my relatives. I'm a freelancer in Taiwan with a lot of hobbies who hasn't done much with her life. 

Of course I didn't say this, and my cousin probably thinks I genuinely am accomplished, rather than just being some white rando who loves Taiwan, has lost her passion for her work, and is learning two languages. Maybe she's even right in a sense, but I couldn't tell in what sense. I have no idea how to come to terms with my own convoluted deixis. 

Being privileged but kinda sad is a trope, and often a pathetic one. It makes me think of a wealthy '50s housewife hopped up on barbiturates, washing the dishes as she stares out the kitchen window. But then there's that viral meme about how great it would be to vacuum the house while high on quaaludes like our ancestors. Honestly, some days it doesn't sound all that bad. 

The friend I stayed with -- the lawyer with the starter home -- has recently lost a massive amount of weight. That too is her story to tell, but it's more complicated than a straightforward celebration. She described a very unlike-her fantasy of moving out to a McLean McMansion to start her Hot Wife Life: yoga pants, Stanley cup, the lot of it. 

The Jenna who lives in Taiwan and has a lot going on in her life joked that she'd need a horrible pyramid scheme "job" to complete the tableau. The anxious Jenna whose career seems to have stalled and who never feels quite secure regarding money sees the appeal. 

On my last night in Falls Church, three of the old college gang were sharing memories. I love a good Terrible People story, so I talked about a Halloween party so bad that I took my bottle of cheap tequila home because I didn't want someone dressed as a sexy honeybee who was destined for the Hot Wife Life to have it.

Another recalled briefly dating my then-best friend (we no longer speak; it's for the best). The third asked if we remembered the time I bought a CD single of Live's Lightning Crashes at Eastern Market, an old song even at the time, and we laid on the floor in my Rosslyn apartment listening to it on a loop.

All I could do was exclaim that I couldn't imagine having bought a Live CD, but apparently I did. It reads a bit hokey now, a tad cringe, but then we were all cringe back then. 

But you know what has buoyed my maudlin thoughts on this train to New York, where I'll catch a plane back to Taiwan and a life I'm eager to return to while also feeling a little depressed about? A cringe 90s song about confusion setting in and forces pulling from the center of the Earth again.

It's the perfect lament for four hours gliding along a single track toward a final, immutable destination, alongside so many other inconsequential humans skittering like hard-shelled bugs to the myriad consequences of our privilege and our choices. 

What I've been up to with my writing

I don't blog quite as often as I used to, but that doesn't mean I'm not writing. I thought I'd add a post with a general redux of what I've been publishing elsewhere...y'know, in case anyone cares. 

Most importantly, I urge everyone to check out this feature in the Taipei Times. Despite same-sex marriage being legal since 2019, some same-sex international couples -- that is, a foreigner married to a Taiwanese person -- are struggling to obtain Taiwanese citizenship for their children. It's the subject of at least one lawsuit against the Ministry of the Interior, as you'll read in my interview with one of the plaintiffs. 

Despite equality being enshrined in the constitution, and access to some (but not all) equal rights being extended to same-sex couples in Taiwan, true equality remains elusive. I sincerely hope this lawsuit will change that, and that the issue gets the attention it deserves. 

Speaking of citizenship rights, I also wrote something for Ketagalan Media on an initiative by Crossroads Taiwan asking the government to provide a reasonable path to dual nationality for permanent residents in Taiwan. There's even a petition, and although the interface can be challenging, I ask that you not only sign, but share it widely. As someone who considers herself a 'lifer' in Taiwan, this issue affects me personally. Without citizenship, it's difficult to plan for retirement: where exactly are we going to live if we can't get a mortgage approved, when landlords don't like to rent to the elderly? It's saddening to have no representation or say in the government of the country I call home.

And the government's excuses for not providing a reasonable, accessible pathway ring hollow --  they speak of 'loyalty' but just about anyone whose ancestors were Republic of China citizens can become Taiwanese. So they assume that, say, a person of Chinese heritage born in the US, whose ancestors may have never set foot in Taiwan, will be loyal to Taiwan. But not someone who decided she loved this country so much that she'd decide to make it her permanent home? They speak of security, and yes, that's a concern, but again -- how likely is a permanent resident in Taiwan likely to be co-opted by the Chinese government, and do they even try to determine whether, say, an American descendant of an ROC national has been? Come on.

In fact, Ketagalan Media has been getting a lot of my attention now that it's been properly revived. As it turns out, I also have opinions about nuclear power in Taiwan! You'd think as a diehard Splittist Separatist Independence Dog that I'd fall in line with the DPP and be anti-nuclear, but I'm actually not. I have concerns about it, but I actually think it's possible to do nuclear safely in Taiwan. The real question is, why hasn't the pro-nuclear crowd (really just the KMT and their ancillary admirers) done more to reassure the public that they prioritize safety? Do they prioritize safety? Given their history of lies and some very scary allegations, I can't say for certain that they do.

I'm also one of the authors of the 2024 Louis Vuitton Taipei City Guide, which is pretty cool. I handled restaurants, style and nightlife, which is somewhat hilarious because I have no style and I usually don't partake in nightlife (but I did seek out lots of good recommendations, and I have ideas for the next edition if I'm invited back). While some of my recommendations have moved (Joseph Bistro is now Summer Flowers) and others are going out of business (I'm really going to miss A-Cai's), others are still going strong. 

I've also been writing for local travel and tourism magazines. I drank so much coffee that I made myself slightly ill for a piece on Taiwan's upscale coffee revolution (and got to interview some interesting people, including a coffee roaster who opened her own cafe, an employee at SanFormosan (they don't do 'titles' there, it's very communal), the general manager of Simple Kaffa, and representatives from the Coffee Industrial Alliance of Taiwan. 

In fact, I've interviewed a lot of fascinating people over the past few years. I learned more about the history of Bao'an Temple (保安宮) from its chairman, Liao Wu-jyh (廖武治), discussed history and aesthetics with an expert on the Eight Generals (八家將), and traditional Taiwanese puppetry and its history with Robin Ruizendaal, a puppet master from the Netherlands who has also made Taiwan his permanent home -- and probably speaks better Taiwanese than I do. (Mine's not that good yet). There have been other articles, but these are the most memorable. 

I've also been writing for Taiwan Scene, including a piece on working as an expat woman in Taiwan. I wrote another on places to visit in Wanhua -- I can't find the link right now, but will post it when I do. 

Anyway, I've been busy, and there's more to come, including completed interviews with the general secretary of the Taipei Zoo and a well-known Taiwanese designer, and two or three more rapid-fire pieces for Ketagalan Media. 

This year's Double Ten design is U-G-L-Y and it ain't got no alibi

 

No, not this. This is actually pretty cool -- it came from here -- and I'm in favor. No, no, the 2024 National Day logo looks exactly like a design for the Republic of China, not Taiwan. It's also an aesthetic monstrosity:

IT UGLY.

If you immediately clocked this as a KMT "Chinese identity" throwback, you're absolutely right. Although I did not actively know that the design committee is organized by the Legislative Yuan and chaired by the speaker, I subconsciously inferred it from this absolute blight on the eyeballs. The legislature is currently controlled by the KMT, so even though the DPP is the "ruling party", this looks like something your crotchety grandpa who shouts that you call yourself Taiwanese because "those 太綠班 brainwashed you kids" would wear on a t-shirt he got for free and wore for the next 17 years.

Maybe it's the subliminal messaging from the giant "H" in the center, that some have already compared to the old Han Kuo-yu bomber jackets. 

Maybe it's the return to the ROC-flag inspired blue and red, or the plum blossom that just doesn't seem to be sitting quite right in the center: I can't quite pinpoint why it looks wrong, but I'll offer a few thoughts on that below. Maybe it's the failure to mention Taiwan in Mandarin, referring to it only in English. 

Just kidding -- it's all of these things. And yes, there's been an obvious design shift based on who runs the committee: 

From here

Seriously, it screams "a government committee designed this", which is exactly what happened. As a commenter below pointed out, it's got big Iron Cross energy, though that's probably unintentional. It's giving "we got super fucked up and watched old Practical Audi-Visual Chinese videos all night". It's giving "Taipei is the capital of Chinese Taipei". It's giving "I fed an AI a steady diet of TVBS for six months and then asked it to design a logo."

Actually, while I didn't feed an AI months of TVBS (not even AI deserves that), I did ask it to generate some designs based on the typical parameters for these logos. Perhaps my prompt engineering could be improved as it kept defaulting to circles, not double tens, but here are a few that made me chortle:

AI seems to show a similar level of commitment to the CCP as the KMT does, but remember, AI isn't sentient. Anyway, I think that thicc-bottomed sun in the bottom left is actually a better logo than the one the government actually unveiled. 

As with the KMT, the AI generator likes big suns and it cannot lie:

Also a fan of the retro zero: 

Artificial intelligence creates even simple characters like 十 about as well as a tattoo artist on one of the seedier Jersey Shore boardwalks who misread the dose on his edible. And yet, it still understands the KMT's secret heart: 

...although I'm not sure why it decided that Double Ten needed to imply beeeewwwwbs.

And this one just looks kind of like a stylized butthole, heh heh:

I'll throw in a few more at the end for your amusement.

My favorite part of this isn't the comment about the giant H or that it looks like the Super Mario warp pipes, it's the defensive commentary from the KMT on a design so many people seem to hate. 

I mean, as a Facebook friend commented, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and perhaps Luftwaffe officers would appreciate the aesthetic. I can think of some dead KMTers with close family ties to the early regime who would love it. But, you know, probably unintentional, right?

Legislative Speaker (barf) Han Kuo-yu called it a "beautiful work" that "carries Taiwan's deepest emotions" -- which is true, if you assume only KMT settlers and their offspring over the age of 60 have emotions.

I also enjoyed this quote: 

Interior Ministry Deputy Minister Wu Tang-an (吳堂安) complimented netizens’ rich imaginations and added that if you look closely, the colors line up with Taiwan’s flag.

He's not wrong exactly, but to see that it imitates the flag, you'd only have to look "closely" if you had glaucoma. 

Wu also said that the theme of 2024's National Day celebrations was "happy birthday to the Republic of China". Okay, but I thought that was the theme every year?

Wu is an absolute comedy machine, by the way. He tied the plum blossom -- a symbol of the KMT, which ran a brutal, deadly suppression campaign for decades under Martial Law -- to "respect for history", and said the blue and red symbolize "different opinions and voices coming together". Sorry dude, but the Republic of China flag that the KMT imposed on Taiwan, which is obvious in the design, isn't known historically for "different opinions and voices". It's known for one voice -- the dictator's -- coming together with his minions and cronies to use the military to disappear, torture and slaughter dissidents. 

According to several sources, the design was created by a team of "passionate young designers". They apparently prefer anonymity, which should surprise no-one. As is common in Taiwan, the committee trotted out "it was designed by a team" to avoid admitting that anyone in particular wasted their parents' money on design school. 

Also, I gotta say, "young designers" created this thing? At some point in my prompt journey I told the AI to make the designs "more retro" and it came up with some ideas that, while very weird, at least looked retro in a cool way. This is the sort of logo you'd see on a mug in your parents' cupboard that you'd immediately donate it to charity. Retro, but it's not a compliment.

Or maybe these designers are indeed "young", if measured on a KMT timescale. You know, the same scale on which Taipei mayor Chiang Wan-an is young (he's 45). 

The thing is, my dislike of the design isn't just because the KMT sucks, the flag is an ugly reminder of a dead dictatorship, and contemporary, democratic Taiwan deserves better than to be forced to swallow a party logo as a national symbol. 

It's also just a bad design. 

I keep looking at that plum blossom, wondering what in the absolute hell is wrong with it. Perhaps the two petals on the bottom and one on top (which is standard) make it look bottom-heavy when it's placed in the middle of that long, slim line. The blue field taken from the ROC flag cutting into the H makes it look off-center, even though I don't think it is. The design lacks balance: this might be the only time I'll ever say that there's too much going on in the left and center, and not enough on the right. 

The whole thing also looks a bit like it's being crushed? Stretching it out on the sides but keepin' it stumpy on the vertical doesn't evoke progress, innovation or the future. It gives "we're trying to expand our influence but are being crushed by the weight of history" -- which I suppose is an apt metaphor for the Republic of China. 

Long 'n Stumpy here also has a certain...je ne sais quoi. Except, oh wait, je very much sais quoi. You could call it Iron Cross, but I'm gonna call call it "I want to take a picture of my junk, but stretch it a bit so it looks normal and less like a chode." 

I'm not sure if the designers wanted the 十十 to look slimmer, or if they were trying to evoke stately columns or...what, but the edges read "serif" and if there's anything that just doesn't work on Chinese characters, even the simplest ones, it's freakin' serifs. 

Personally, although I'm a Century Gothic acolyte, I like a serif in some cases. I enjoy a nice Garamond or Cochin from time to time. I can ride with Baskerville, and if you're looking for something new, Self Modern isn't bad. I don't think they're hopelessly old-fashioned per se. 

But they don't scream "modern and clean graphics" as Wu Tang-an suggests. I see defensive borders, pushing anything new or foreign from the center. Or maybe they're closing ranks, keeping the riff-raff out. A serif is okay in some circumstances, but these absolutely convey the message that the KMT wants you damn kids to get off their lawn. 

That's not even getting into the clunkiness of the design language. It does not evoke. It does not reference. There is no subtle metaphor. It whacks you over the head with a dollar-store baseball bat. It's the difference between the person who references their love of retro sci-fi with hints of chrome and black in their decor, versus the one who hangs a papier-mâché UFO in their living room.

It does not hint at the ROC flag -- there's a literal ROC flag in the motto! Y'know, because the theme is "happy birthday to the Republic of China", which is a totally fresh and innovative theme to have! It's not symbolic of the KMT's Republic of China vision so much as a simple product of it. And I do mean "simple" in the cruelest possible way.

Something about the size, thickness and spacing of the English, compared to the relatively lighter Mandarin is just off. It's too long and fat, which is yet another thing I never thought I'd say. I know that slogans which aren't necessarily sentences sometimes have periods for emphasis, but something about this period feels wrong. Perhaps the phrase is so long that one's brain is tricked into thinking it could be a sentence, but it's not one.

I didn't always love the Double Ten designs created by DPP-led legislative committees. But at the very least they were contemporary. They weren't afraid to look at colors beyond red, white and blue. You could tell someone under the age of 70 had a hand in designing them. With the possible exceptions of 2019 and 2023, if someone gave you a mug featuring one, you might actually keep it. 

That's all I really have to say, so enjoy some more trippy AI designs for "Republic of China National Day". While I like the terrifying birds, the Alien Body Horror Sphere is also rather eye-catching.