Wednesday, January 12, 2011

A Son's A Son

After reading this lengthy piece in The Atlantic (and watching the more easily digestible TED talk talk that author Hanna Rosin gave on the same topic), I couldn't help but apply Rosin's thoughts to my experience in Taiwan. Let's begin with where it discusses the traditional preference across much of the world (for our purposes, Asia) for a son. Rosin says:

And the global economy is evolving in a way that is eroding the historical preference for male children, worldwide. Over several centuries, South Korea, for instance, constructed one of the most rigid patriarchal societies in the world. Many wives who failed to produce male heirs were abused and treated as domestic servants; some families prayed to spirits to kill off girl children.

Then, in the 1970s and ’80s, the government embraced an industrial revolution and encouraged women to enter the labor force. Women moved to the city and went to college. They advanced rapidly, from industrial jobs to clerical jobs to professional work. The traditional order began to crumble soon after. In 1990, the country’s laws were revised so that women could keep custody of their children after a divorce and inherit property. In 2005, the court ruled that women could register children under their own names. As recently as 1985, about half of all women in a national survey said they “must have a son.” That percentage fell slowly until 1991 and then plummeted to just over 15 percent by 2003. Male preference in South Korea “is over,” says Monica Das Gupta, a demographer and Asia expert at the World Bank. “It happened so fast. It’s hard to believe it, but it is.” The same shift is now beginning in other rapidly industrializing countries such as India and China.

I'm not sure I buy this. First of all, the survey doesn't seem to cover the nuances of male-baby preference in Asia. It asks women if they "must" have a son, and notes that rates of women who feel they must have male issue have plunged.

That's great - I do hope for a world in which parents in all countries welcome children of both genders equally and give them equal opportunities and treatment (though I realize that day is far off) - but the "must" is misleading.

Go back and ask those women if they want a son more than a daughter, or if they would prefer a son. Ask them which gender they'd choose if they could - a conditional statement that's becoming more of a real option to families. I bet you'd get a far higher number. I imagine from my own observation that the results would look something like:

45% (or thereabouts) would actively prefer a son including about 15% who feel they "must" have one

20% (or thereabouts) would actively prefer a daughter, including maybe 2% who feel they "must" have a daughter, if that

35% (or whatever's left) don't mind either way

Of course these numbers are so unscientific it's not funny; do you, however, disagree? (If so, I'd love to hear it in the comments). Does your own observation vary greatly?

So what you still get - according to my guesstimates - is a strong preference for sons, including the small percentage who feel they "must" have a boy plus all the parents who don't feel they "must" have a boy but would still prefer one. The dramatic drop in mothers who don't feel they "must" have sons would be caught mostly in the "prefer" category, or moved to the "don't care" category. Almost none would move from "needing" a son to preferring a daughter.

Who still wins? The sons, as always.

As for those who would actively prefer a daughter, well, one thing definitely is changing. Anyone who lives in Asia knows about the cultural custom where the oldest son, specifically, is charged with caring for his parents when they are elderly. I'm going to argue below that this is slowly changing, and that Western ideas about caregiving are becoming more prevalent.

You still see this in India, for instance: notice how the eldest son of many families rarely moves abroad and, fairly often, stays near the family home - or his parents, at retirement age, move to wherever he has settled and built a career. The son who moves abroad or travels widely is usually the younger brother.

In Taiwan, you'll note how many offspring, as they establish themselves, buy real estate for not only themselves but their parents. I once made the mistake of assuming my forty-ish, single male student, an R&D engineer, lived with his parents when he said that he, well, lives with his parents (you can see how I was confused). Not true at all: his parents live with him; he owns the property. Another student of mine, another elder son: he bought a new apartment for his young family, and moved his parents in with them. His mother didn't really like the apartment and wanted to move back into their old apartment...with her son and his family. So they did. Because Mom said so. He currently rents out his nicer, newer property.

However, most of you also know that in the West, we have a saying: "a son's a son until he takes a wife, but a daughter's a daughter all her life". I don't actually agree with this at all. I personally feel that my relationship with my parents and my husband's relationship with his parents are roughly equal, and neither of us is 'more' or 'less' still a child of our parents than the other...but it is a widely-held notion. (I am curious as to what the actual statistics are of daughters vs. sons as caregivers to aging parents in the USA. My bet would be more daughters than sons take this role, but I'm not sure).

It is becoming so in Taiwan, as well. Again and again, I've had friends and students tell me that they, as daughters, expect to be the primary caregivers or from parents who now feel that their studious, family-oriented daughters will better provide for them in their old age.

Back to the made-up numbers I postulated. I have a few reasons for these estimates in Taiwan, keeping in mind that the survey reflects results from South Korea, not Taiwan. It's sadly clear that there is still a trend of aborting female fetuses in Taiwanese abortion clinics, for starters. If I am remembering correctly, there are still more men than women in the population in Taiwan, and until recently (as in, within the last generation) unwanted daughters were openly adopted out. I have several students who talk about "aunts" who are genetically aunts, but were given to other families as children to be raised. My neighbor, Old Fang, spent thirty minutes telling me in a combination of Chinese and Hakka (which I don't speak) that her parents "didn't want her" and "threw her away" to another family so they could "spend money on her brother". Old Fang is, as you have surely guessed, quite old - my guess is 90 - but she's evidence that this was commonplace even in living memory.

I know another woman who is currently on leave from work because she got married recently and now "really wants" a son: her traditional in-laws expect a grandchild soon, and they expect male issue. Another student, in a toast during a group dinner not long before my own wedding, said "A toast with my best wishes to Jenna...I hope she has a happy wedding party and makes many sons!"

So, Hanna, don't tell me that sons are no longer preferred in Asia. You're skewing the surveys in the way the question was worded.

Friday, January 7, 2011

sick sick sick

Has it really been a week since I've posted anything?

Wow. Sorry guys. I've been sick: at home today with something that's worse than a cold but not quite the flu, with just enough energy to go see a substanceless movie that I don't have to pay a lot of attention to (Morning Glory). I'd totally go see Season of the Witch, but that's clearly a 4-beer movie...not any four beers, but four Belgians. We're talking Chimay Blue here.

Back on my regular blogging here-and-there soon, once I feel better!

Friday, December 31, 2010

New Year's Eve Best Engrish of 2010 Roundup


In the elevator of an office building on Minsheng/Dunhua Intersection

I thought I'd let 2010 out with a bang, by posting my favorite Engrish from four years in Taiwan and trips to Japan, Central America, Egypt, Indonesia and India. Most of this particular Engrish comes straight from Taiwan. As the year slips away into...well, another year...hope you are have great enjoy time of the Engrish!


First Bank ATM warning

Nothing is more delicious than curried Snoopy (from Japan)


...saideth the lady of the establishment as she doth print'd the sign.


Even though our cat has proven himself gloriously inept at catching mice, I still won't be using this on him.


Ahem. This is from a pet store.


Ah, Japan.


Ooh, that's the kind of care I want! My care wasn't horny enough before.


This coffee just makes me sad.


You can buy horny skin care next door. (near Shuanglian MRT)


There's no actual reason why this sounds as disgusting as it does. But it does. Yes...it does. (near Wanlong MRT...not far from Chili Lubricants which I'm also planning to get a picture of)

The Hsinchu subsidiary of Oh!God!Ya!


Near Wugong Elementary School. Oh, old folks. I thought we were sending them to Mars?


Get your pot plants here!


They've actually changed the name of this shop, you know. A different sign by the same company appeared on Engrish.com years ago.


Strangely well-named.


There will be consequences.


Yummy....coffee that tastes of coal!


I want to decry "WTF!" pretty often, I must say.
(it stands for World Taekwondo Federation...really)


I love everything about this 台妹 - from her ratty little dog to her plastic slippers, makeup and hair (she was smoking but you can't see it in the photo). But it makes it onto this post because of her glorious T-shirt.


If I were an ignorant American who decided to open a Mexican restaurant, I think I might just name it Restaurante Los Tacos. Try our Chupalito Maximo!


You'd think that screaming loudly would be enough for them to show their presence. Do they really need to defecate on people's heads as well?


From Egypt. "King Dude" is awesome, but "Managed by John&John" is transcendental.


This would be fine in Latin America, but it's a souvenir shop in Egypt. Err...


I got nothin' to say about this. It is what it is.


Little vanilla bimbos.


I thought it might be a misspelling of something but after seeing the picture...no, they really meant to call it "Snobs".


Worst camel safari company name EVER.


Ooh! A victorious flag will flutter for me!


A never-ending source of fun. Every joke I could make about this brand of nuts has been made...trust me.


I love reading classic 2009 works of English literature and soaking up the ancient, deeply-held traditions of Old England, which has been settled and culturally relevant since...2009!


It's hard to read, but says "Dipping into Boring Pie...Getting Out of Boring (something)"


These magnets are the epitome of selfishness.


I'm really scared of Grizzly Bears. (Sold next to Guts bars, which I also need to get a decent photo of.)


Really? Not ANY kind of panda union? Not even one?



What's worse than a disaster? A disastrous disaster!


Well no wonder the building fell down, if it had 1,234 floors!


I live in that house occasionally.

"Pocket Volcano: Science On Your Palm" is funny enough, but then they had to add "Perform 'volcanic eruptions' on the table top, in a bath or even in a glass". Top it off with a gem like "It's an awesome science gadget!" and you've got pure gold.

"If you are attacked by a swarm of bees, every second counts. Run away as fast as you can." Wow, making me feel really safe there.

Oh yeah, and don't hide underwater unless you can swim underwater. Of course.


I like this one less for the English (which is not so bad) than for the picture, which makes it seem like a giant laser beam from an alien spaceship randomly came and struck the cliff where that guy was hiking.


On Caoling Old Trail (Yilan side) - the thing about the "Horse Falling to Death" bridge is that it is probably named after an actual event that took place in 1904 or something...but it doesn't exactly inspire confidence in the average hiker.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

Pingdeng Canal Old Trail (Yangmingshan)



Not long ago, on a fairly warm and sunny Saturday, we hiked the Pingdeng Canal Old Trail outlined in Richard Saunders' Yangmingshan: The Guide.

You can read about how to do it in the book, and anyway I'm not the best person to ask as we got lost, but here are some photos from that lovely day:


If you decide to stop and see Shengren Waterfall (聖人瀑布) on the way, you have to climb a lot of annoying stairs. The good news is that the views are nice.


...as well as amusing and homey.


Shengren Waterfall - technically prohibited to get that close but whatever. There are a few sections of the trail that are technically "prohibited" but you can go anyway; it's perfectly safe.


An old, not terribly attractive but legitimately antique, temple by the base of the stairs.


The stream we "illegally" crossed to get to the waterfall.



Yeah....um....yeah. Um. BAD naming choice, guys.

Later on you have to scramble over rocks along a low stream to get to where the trail picks up again, and oh yeah, the actual path to the trail is indiscernable so we had to scramble through brush and mud to get back to the part that was actually walkable, in prime snake-hole territory. Fun. Richard, you may want to look into that when you advise on taking a nonexistent fork to a path above.


We were confused later, and ran into this guy about an hour after our detour around a ridge (another unclear trail junction. Grrrr, Richard. Grr. It said bear right, and we did, and right took us up and over an unnecessary ridge). He looked like he knew what he was talking about and directed us to Qingtiangang.


Polluted sunset over Qingtiangang. You can't even see Taipei and its sprawl through the smog. I blame China.


For dinner, we had delicious lamb and other dishes at Ah-Guo's Lamb Restaurant - 阿國羊肉 - near Wenhua University, and mediocre kung pao chicken. Next time, we'll try the goose.


We did get to see some rare color-changed autumn leaves along the canal, though.

All in all, a lovely day hike but after months of not hiking (foot problems) it really wiped me out. Also, better directions would have been nice.